I’M A SLUT AND I KNOW YOU ARE TOO!
First, let me redefine the term ‘SLUT’ for you.. I like to see it as being ‘Sexually Liberated with Unlimited Talents!’ . It is not about sleeping around, it’s about embracing ourselves as the super sexual beings that we actually are! Let’s stop the slut shaming people!
If you told me years ago that I would be publically talking about sex and my sexual experiences on social media and in the media, I would not have believed you! I would be like…’Nooooo…can I say that out loud?!’
Oh yes I can and I have and I am doing it right now!
Of course posting things like this is now my normal. Sometimes I forget that other people don’t talk like this. Often when I post about it, people say, ‘wow good on for you for putting that out there.’ I’m thinking ‘oh yeah, that’s right, other people don’t’ talk about sex like this on social media, especially about their personal experiences!’ Well why the hell not? Why this can’t be everyone’s normal? We should be able to speak openly about sex!!
Arghhhhh I’m so sick of the taboo that is keeping us so damn small.
I would rather know that everyone is experiencing amazing orgasmic deeply connected experiences instead of people ranting about how shit the weather is. I want orgasms, not the weather! Actually I totally did a post about the weather being cold the other week, but hey, at least I was also having orgasms whilst it was cold….I’m pretty sure orgasms raise your body temperature! Hmm I’ll have to test that one out!
Years ago I had a group of friends who I would talk about sex in front of and they would give me dirty looks or whisper behind my back, scared I was going to try sleep with their boyfriends! I felt totally judged. As though I was some slut. Okay, okay I did sleep around and I was a total SLUT – yes that’s me right here, over here, thank you very much. I am sexually liberated. I have talents. I am unlimited. You can’t shame me for it, because I own that shit.
Once I left those friends I went to the extreme opposite and became a swinger! I was what they called a unicorn – a single woman in the swinging scene. This was a place where not only did I feel accepted, my sexual desires were embraced and encouraged! A place where my friends actually wanted me to sleep with their boyfriends! These were my kind of people!! I felt a sense of belonging. We were all super sluts…yessssss!!!
However, I was totally disconnected and disassociated from my body. I was either drinking or on drugs and I wasn’t consciously there. I was seeking intimacy but avoiding it at the same time. Desperately wanting to be seen, but so afraid to be seen. Every swingers party was just looking for that next ‘hit’ of sexual validation, that somehow gave me a sense of worthiness.
Let’s be clear here though… Just because I chose this lifestyle from this place it doesn’t make it wrong. It doesn’t make me bad. It makes me human. And not everyone chooses it why I did. Some people really genuinely love to express themselves sexually in this way.
So from there things got even more crazy and wild (can you even imagine?!) and eventually this led to me not even wanting to have sex at all!! Which in turn led me to deep inner work and into my path as a sexual healer and coach. I have a lot more to share on this which I’ll save for my sexy confessional book I’m currently writing, you can be in first to get a $1 copy when it’s launched – get on it here.
So I have been speaking to a lot of women lately asking them what they would love to experience sexually. The response keeps coming down to that they know they are sexual beings but they haven’t felt safe to truly express themselves, to fully own themselves as the amazing sexual beings that they know they are!! They want to reclaim this part of them, the deep slutty sluts they are! Okay that wasn’t actually their words, but ultimately there is a slut in all of us and it is time to stop hiding her! To bring her juicy goodness out into the light!
And I say it is about freaking time!
Bloody Hell our sexual desires are so suppressed! Damn you society and your bullshit conditioning and control! It is crazy how much shame there is around sex and self-pleasure. Self-pleasure is one of the greatest ways that we can practice self-care and connect to ourselves as sexual beings. The shame often comes from when we are children and we are caught being sexual. Then we just do it secretly anyway, we hide it, which then creates this shame and a lack of self-worth. Then we go out as adults seeking unhealthy and unconscious sexual experiences trying to feel worth. Then we get shamed for this and feel more shame and more lack of self-worth and we often find other ways to numb and hide ourselves and it just becomes a vicious shame cycle!! Eeeeek!!
When really all we need to do is to love and embrace ourselves as the super sexual beings we know deep down truly are! To embrace the SLUT!! I say that sex education in school really needs to be around this!! Can you imagine a class on how to be a slut?! A healthy slut. Slutty Education. Slut School. Un-Religious Sexducation. Hmmm….how about a class on ‘How to be Sexually Liberated and embrace your Unlimited Talents’ – yes please!
But seriously we really need to be teaching children how to embrace their sexuality and express this in a healthy way! I would have rathered this than being taught the old boring anatomy shit that half of us don’t even remember. And really, does any man’s penis look or feel like a banana?! C’mon…please!! Actually my all girls catholic school never got taught that either. Where was my banana huh?! Interestingly, we had the highest rate of pregnancies at school in the country. However, I remained a virgin my whole school life, and lost my virginity to my ex-husband who I married when I was just 17 years..that story will be in my book too!
Oh yes…. I was the ‘good girl’!! The slut in me was a late bloomer! But when she did… oh boy did she bloom!!
So what if the key to true happiness, love and full self-worth really is just to deeply love this part of us? To connect to ourselves on a sexual level? To heal our shame that we have so deeply stored inside of ourselves? That has in fact been stored inside our genitals? That has been stopping us from feeling the full orgasmic pleasure that we are supposed to feel!!
Let’s stop the shame. Stop the Stigma and RECLAIM ourselves as the sexual beings we are!!
As SLUTS – As Sexually Liberated with Unlimited Talents!!
P.S. My Free 5 Day Sexual Healing Challenge for women is on! This is about reclaiming ourselves as sexual beings and healing the shame that has been stored in our bodies and stopping us from feeling the multi-orgasmical experiences that I know we are all capable of!
LADIES: Join in by joining my closed facebook group of soulful, sexual women.
MEN: if you want your own challenge, join me here and I’ll email you when I launch it!